New Parent Mistakes to Avoid: 50 Things I Wish I Knew Before Baby

Why Share a "Regret List"?

"If I could do it over, I definitely wouldn't..."

Every experienced parent has said this. New parents are overwhelmed with information, often fixating on details while missing what truly matters.

This list compiles real lessons from real parents to help you avoid common pitfalls.

Shopping Regrets

Regret: Buying Too Much

Impulse Buy	Actual Use	Lesson
3 boxes of newborn diapers	Outgrown in 2 weeks	Newborns grow fast; buy small quantities
10 newborn outfits	Only wore 3 during first month	2-3 outfits are enough
Formula prep machine	Only needed if bottle-feeding	Wait until feeding method is decided
Smart baby scale	Used one month, then sat idle	Hospital weighs at checkups
Fancy crib bedding set	Doctor said not safe	Safe sleep = mattress + fitted sheet only

Regret: Buying Cheap

Cheap Purchase	Consequence	Lesson
Budget stroller	Hard to push, replaced quickly	Stroller is worth the investment
Knockoff car seat	Didn't trust it, bought new one	Never skimp on safety items
Cheap breast pump	Painful, affected milk supply	Quality matters for baby essentials
Bargain diapers	Severe diaper rash	Try samples before committing

Regret: Not Buying

Didn't Buy	Later Realized	Recommendation
Electric swing/bouncer	Rocked manually until exhausted	Hands-free lifesaver
Waterproof mattress pads	Changed sheets daily	Essential consumable
Nursing pillow	Arms ached from feeding	Actually useful
Nasal aspirator	Helpless when baby was congested	Cold season essential
Quality baby carrier	Back pain from holding	Must-have for extended carrying

Feeding Regrets

Regret: Being Too Rigid

"I regret pushing myself to the brink for exclusive breastfeeding"

Real voices from moms:

• Slept only 2 hours daily chasing milk supply
• Refused to supplement, led to jaundice
• Cried through countless nursing sessions
• Felt better after letting go

Healthier mindset:

• Breastmilk is good, but mom's mental health matters more
• Mixed feeding is a valid choice
• No need to feel guilty about how you feed

Regret: Giving Up Too Soon

"I regret not pushing through just a bit longer"

Other moms' perspectives:

• Quit when initial pain was too much
• Didn't know it gets better after two weeks
• Wish I had hired a lactation consultant

Suggestions:

• Seek help when facing difficulties
• Get professional guidance (lactation consultant)
• Give yourself 2-4 weeks to adjust

Postpartum Period Regrets

Decisions Regretted

Regret	Result	Advice
Having mother-in-law handle postpartum	Constant conflicts	Set boundaries upfront, or hire help
Skipped postpartum help to save money	Exhausted into depression	Postpartum help is an investment
Didn't shower during recovery	Miserable	Modern recovery allows bathing
Drank heavy soups daily	Severe clogged ducts	Light, balanced nutrition instead
Refused all help	Completely burned out	Accepting help isn't weakness

Regret Not Doing

• Didn't learn newborn care beforehand
• Didn't agree on division of labor with partner
• Didn't carve out rest time for myself
• Didn't document baby's growth moments
• Didn't take proper family photos postpartum

Relationship Regrets

Common Regret Scenarios

1. "Regret not aligning parenting views with my partner beforehand"

• One wanted to rock to sleep, one wanted sleep training
• One wanted to bundle up, one wanted fewer layers
• Arguments increased dramatically

2. "Regret letting my partner be hands-off"

• Didn't let him do anything during first month
• Result: he couldn't care for the baby
• When I finally wanted help, he "didn't know how"

3. "Regret not making time for each other"

• 24/7 focused only on baby
• Forgot about our relationship
• First year postpartum has highest divorce rates

Recommendations

• Before baby: Discuss parenting philosophy and responsibilities
• First month: Let dad participate; don't criticize his attempts
• Regularly: Date nights, even if just watching a movie together
• During conflict: Focus on issues, not attacks; communicate promptly

Physical Recovery Regrets

Often Overlooked

Ignored Issue	Consequence	Recommendation
Skipped pelvic floor therapy	Incontinence issues	Get assessed at 6-week checkup
Ignored diastasis recti	Belly wouldn't flatten	Get professional evaluation, targeted exercises
Rushed to lose weight	Health deteriorated	Focus on recovery first 6 months
Hid postpartum depression	Condition worsened	Seek help immediately
No exercise	Chronic back pain	Gradually resume activity

6-Week Postpartum Checkup Must-Dos

• Uterus recovery
• Pelvic floor assessment
• Diastasis recti check
• Breast examination
• Mental health screening
• Blood tests

Time Management Regrets

Regrettable Mindsets

"Regret spending so much time anxious"

• Constantly comparing on parenting forums
• Worried at every slight difference
• Anxiety didn't help, just added exhaustion

"Regret not enjoying the moment"

• Kept thinking "it'll get better after this phase"
• Missed so many beautiful moments
• Baby grew up too fast

Time Planning Tips

Priority Order:

1. Baby's basic needs (eating, sleeping, safety)
2. Your own rest
3. Housework can wait
4. Unnecessary socializing can be reduced

Time Allocation:

• When baby sleeps, you sleep
• Use machines when possible, not manual effort
• Accept help instead of doing everything yourself

Relationship Regrets

With Elders

Regrettable Approach	Better Approach
Let grandparents take full control	You lead, they assist
Corrected them publicly	Private conversation, respect feelings
Followed all their advice	Make key decisions yourself
Held everything in	Address conflicts promptly

With Friends

Regrettable Approach	Better Approach
Cut off all socializing	Maintain some connections
Brought baby to every gathering	Be flexible; don't force it
Distanced friends who "didn't understand"	Maintain important friendships

Summary: New Parent Survival Rules

Shopping

• Buy less, wait, try before stocking up
• Never skimp on safety; convenience items can be budget-friendly

Feeding

• Fed is best; method is secondary
• Seek help when facing challenges

Relationships

• Partners are teammates, not opponents
• Accept help and express gratitude

Mindset

• Perfect parents don't exist
• Anxiety doesn't help; sleep matters most
• Enjoy the journey—babies grow up fast

---

Use Baby Checklist to plan your first year scientifically and avoid the common pitfalls!